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The Kingdom of Denmark
Denmark '''(more properly ''Kongeriget Danmark ''in potatospeak) is a kingdom. Duh. He's the animorphic personification of the Kingdom of Denmark, making him close to 2,000 years old and an expert when it comes to being a kingdom, fighting in wars, and farming potatoes. All this age does not equal maturity, unless maturity means "fuck, I just lost all my farmland," which some historians argue it might.*''' Nor does he often win said wars. He arrived in-game on May 18th and currently lives somewhere. age: 23 physicaly, god only knows actually. origins: Axis Powers: Hetalia, canon. app link: Right here! hmd: Right here! played by: Parron contact: 'AIM: theshiniest. E-mail: sparkling.onions at gmail.com. Plurk: parron. Setting Picture our world. I'll wait. Now, picture it just a little bit weirder, and that's Hetalia. The main concept of the series is that each nation has its own anamorphic personification; exactly what part of the nation they are personifying (the literal land? the people?) isn't made clear but it's usually assumed to be all of it. This personification lives and works with his or her people, fights in their wars, conducts diplomatic missions, and interacts with their "boss", aka, their king/president/prime minister or whatever else. Nations start off as cute children and grow older as the country itself grows, and are in other ways tied to their land—Rome dies eventually; China gains scars from wars, and so on. They also tend to have body parts or items representing land or territories: America's glasses are Texas, and Austria has a strand of hair that represents a holy site. Hetalia, for the most part, is a series of sketches set throughout history, using these characters to represent events both political and historical: Wars are fights between personifications, but real soldiers also take part; treaties are often shown as friendships, but the politics behind them are also mentioned. Likewise, the personifications take many different personalities; some traits based on historical stereotypes (Italy being useless in wars, Russia being kinda crazy), national ones (France being obsessed with love, America wanting to be the hero), or just their own unique weirdness. The world of Hetalia is also a little bit crazier than our own. There are aliens and friendly whales, giant robots and X-ray glasses, the laws of time and space are often broken, England has fairy friends and uses black magic to summon Russia, sound effects are sometimes physical objects that can be eaten, and everyone is wherever they need to be for the purpose of the joke. While Hetalia is firmly based in reality and real history, it's also fairly aware of the 4th wall and breaks it whenever needed for Rule Of Funny. Even when this causes blatant contradictions—such as Hungary owning a digital camera in the 18th century, or America google searching something in the 1940s. It's best to just kind of roll with it. Personality Despite all the age and gradour of being a country, Denmark is not actually all that complex. Loud, cheerful, enthusiastic, he's the self-proclaimed older brother of the Nordics. He's noted to be at the least not very perceptive and the most a bit of a flake: his official biography notes him to be unaware of Norway's teasing, and his reaction in the comic to being called "noisy" is a cheerful "I see!" He's an unstoppable tease, although his teasing is clearly good natured: when Iceland is offended, he seems honestly surprised and, while he doesn't apologize, is quick to explain that it was just teasing... something none of the other Nordics even bother with. But at the same time, he clearly doesn't think a lot before speaking and acting—which is supported by history; Denmark has the nasty habit of charging into wars without thinking things through. While Denmark's intentions are no doubt always good—even when he is being demanding, it is out of a desire to help improve the lot of the one he is ordering around (Denmark knows best, after all!)—he can undoubtedly be an asshole. He's pushy, demanding, bossy, not good at all at listening or thinking before speaking, and, well, started out his life as a viking. Just saying. He's a bit like a little kid, in a way; unthinking of the consequences of his actions. Because he's always right—what could possibly go wrong? Needless to say, his luck is bad, but everything that goes wrong is completely his own fault. He's actually a bit pathetic—but that said, he's a damn good opportunist, so never finds himself in too bad a place. In fact, Denmark, for all his usual ditzy cheer, always seems to find himself the right allies or right treaties, has been close friends with Russia for centuries just to hide behind him, and is generally more crafty than his usual demeanor hints at. He's no super genius or world power (outside of his own mind), but writing him off as a stupid drunk would probably end up a mistake. He's a people person, helped by the fact that his location in Europe has made everyone always want to be his friend (or, uh, his enemy. But hey). This means he's both good at finding allies and political strategy, but also that he always has friends around to hang out and drink with! It isn't as much that he can scheme and manipulate as much as he has a very good nose for opportunity, and knows when to take them. Really, Denmark is a pretty friendly guy. Although pretty wild and bossy when he was younger, he's calmed down a lot, leaving him still annoying but harmlessly so. He cares a lot about his family (even Sweden, deep down), but especially Norway and Iceland, his best friend and… younger sibling adopted son thing. He's rarely found apart from Norway, who is his best friend in the world, and is protective of Iceland even as he teases him; to say Denmark loves his family is an understatement, and what the rest of his family thinks about this isn't all that important. It has been stated a few times in canon that Denmark can be 'different from how he appears' and so on. As of yet it isn't clear what this means, but I tend to assume that as a reference to his bossy/controlling/viking side, he simply has a bad temper and doesn't take being crossed/ignored/abandoned very well. He can likewise be a bit melodramatic—he runs off yelling and crying when Iceland claims to hate him. He's the land of Hamlet and HC Andersen, okay. And he can—rarely—be serious and thoughtful. But most of the time? What you see is what you get, and what you get is a loud, cheerful, idiot older brother. Abilities & Weaknesses One of the nice things about being so old is Denmark's had a lot of time to learn how to do stuff. Mind, most of this stuff is mundane survival skills (no sonnet writing and brilliant art), but hey, can ''you build a house in three days? Denmark is a great sailor and farmer, and has a love of architecture drawn from his people. He also loves furniture in the "I will stare at this chair for an hour it is so fucking lovely" way, and hates IKEA. Haaaaates. He can speak about eight languages fluently (but none of the romance ones), and is proficient with most types of weapons. Mundanely, Denmark's a pretty decent cook, especially when it comes to desserts and pastries. He loves telling and hearing stories, riding his bike, and being a ridiculously bossy environmentalist. His weaknesses include his enthusiasm and coresponding lack of common sense—he has to put in an effort to stop and think about things. He has a very bad temper if provoked enough, can be both clingy and bossy, and at his worst is a control freak and kind of a bastard. He's also not that great at expressing himself. Or shutting up. Character Relationships He hasn't met anyone in game yet, but since family is #1 to Denmark, I'll use this space to talk about them! S- since, God knows he'll be bringing them up constantly. '''Sweden is the person Denmark has known longest of anyone else. They were born in the same bit of land and grew up as brothers and best friends. They've always bickered and had a rivalry, but were extremely close as children. Things went south in the 16th century when Denmark comitted a massacre in Sweden (hey! it seemed like a good idea at the time!), and they spent the next 200 years hating one another's guts. Only in the last 40 years or so have they been getting along better and repairing their relationship, most symbolically with a bridge, but it's still a bit tense and neither will ever stop picking on one another. Swedes: the grossest humans there are. Norway '''is Denmark's absolute 100% best friend. Denmark loves Norway more than anything, and they were unified for 400 years. To this day, they're still very close and on great terms, and Denmark loves following his bestie around and hanging out. Norway teases him a lot, but Denmark really doesn't notice, instead interprating sarcasm as affection… somehow. He loves Norway dearly! Clearly it's mutual! '''Finland '''is a member of Denmark's Nordic family mostly by default. Although they're similar in personality and get along fine, they just aren't very close, probably because Finland has spent most of his life being a Swedish (gross) province. '''Iceland '''is the person Denmark loves the most after Norway. Denmark has raised Iceland since the 14th century as his colony, and considers him either a little brother or a son or something. Even though they aren't genetically related as Iceland and Norway are (Denmark finds this relation hilarious and awesome), it doesn't change the fact that they've been "family" for centuries. Denmark picks on Iceland, but is also extremely protective of his former colony. Don't mess. '''The Faeroe Islands '''and Greenland are not characters in Hetalia that have appeared, but they are Denmark's two remaining colonies/territories. Faeroes is almost entirely self-sufficient, but sticks around for the allowance Denmark gives (and fondness for the nation); Greenland is a pathetic sinkhole of money who dreams of independence and may not ever get it. Headcanonly, Faeroes is a young teenage girl with dirty blonde hair, and Greenland is a slightly older Inuit boy. Other nations Denmark is close to include '''England, who Denmark conquered and raised for a little while; Denmark has had a soft spot for the guy ever since, and is a total Anglophile—'Germany', Denmark's next-door neighbor, who he's had a pretty bad relationship in the past with. Lately they've been getting along much better, although Denmark is wary of German tourists—'Russia', who has been Denmark's dependable ally for centuries—'The Netherlands', who is pretty much Denmark's bro; they ally together, help one another out, send bikes and retirees back and forth, and are basically great buddies—and lately Australia, homeland of the woman Crown Prince Frederick married. This makes Australia pretty awesome. He has many, many other international relationships, of course, but those are probably the most notable. * Some Historians Argue It Might: "A power, it has been said, gains maturity through defeat. Only the bitter experience of adversity in external relations can teach a power to set limits to its expansion and educate it into being a good neighbor. If maturity in international policies consists in voluntary limitation of territorial objectives, the series of defeats and losses suffered by Denmark in the seventeenth and particularly nineteenth centuries certainly rendered it mature." ''- A History of Denmark, Knud J. V. Jespersen.'' See Also Character permissions. Personality meme. Other stuff, including a list of all canon appearances.